Respect starts with you
It was a Thursday. Started like most days do—meetings, calls, e-mails, updates on the day. One of my calls brought me to a room in the ICU. A room set apart from the rest, where anxious parents were waiting on the outcome of a major surgery. I went to this room to be the communicator, the person tasked with delivering the news that no parent should ever have to hear.
Despite the expertise, knowledge and every ounce of skill poured into the effort, it wasn’t enough. This time, the injury was bigger. This time, it won.
As most of the people quietly left the room, the chaplain and I stayed behind. We turned to the father and asked if he wanted a moment alone with his baby girl to say goodbye. His response surprised us.
He didn’t want to be alone.
He asked us to stay.
And so, we stayed.
We sat next to him while he cradled his precious daughter. He held her, kissed her and began to tell us about her—her little quirks, the light she brought to their family, her favorite song. And then, after a moment, he sang to her.
The song was barely audible, his voice cracking under the weight of unimaginable loss. At one point, he paused, looked at me, placing his hand on my arm and said, “This happened to you too and I’m sorry you’re hurting for us”.
I was speechless. Here he was, facing a grief so deep it had no name, yet he reached out to me with compassion and respect. How could he look past his own loss to comfort someone else?
In that moment, my job no longer mattered. Instead, I found my purpose. My purpose at Cook Children’s. My purpose for being in that room wasn’t about fulfilling a role. It was about being there—truly there—for this family in their time of greatest need.
This moment is one I carry with me daily. A reminder of one of our core values: respect. Respect isn’t just about treating others the way we’d like to be treated. It’s also about seeing our families and patients and their unique experiences, honoring their needs and meeting them where they are.
That father didn’t want to grieve alone, so we stayed. He wanted to share his daughter’s story, so we listened. He needed to hold her, sing to her and say goodbye in his way, and we honored that.
Respect is about presence. It’s about showing up in the moments that matter, with empathy, kindness and care.
This is what we do at Cook Children’s. Every day. And this is why we need your help.
Your support helps us meet families in their most vulnerable moments, offering not just expert care but the compassion and dignity every child and parent deserves. It’s not just our job. It’s our purpose.
Will you help us fulfill that purpose? Your donation ensures that we can continue to treat every family—not just their medical needs but their hearts—with the utmost respect.
Thank you for believing in what we do. For believing in the why behind it all. Together, we can make sure every family feels the care, compassion and respect they deserve.
Sincerely,
Valerie Gibbs
Director of Perioperative Services
